Abundant Living.L19.Amends-Make a List

STEPPING INTO ABUNDANT LIVING – AMENDS – TIME TO MAKE A LIST

PRINCIPLE

We must evaluate all our relationships.  Offer forgiveness to those who have hurt us and make amends for harm we’ve done to others.

4th Beatitude:

Matthew 5: (NIV)

7Blessed are the merciful,
      for they will be shown mercy.

 9Blessed are the peacemakers,
      for they will be called sons of God.
AMPLIFIED BIBLE
 7Blessed (happy, ^[j]to be envied, and ^[k]spiritually prosperous--^[l]with life-joy and satisfaction in God's favor and salvation, regardless of their outward conditions) are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy!
    9Blessed (enjoying ^[p]enviable happiness, ^[q]spiritually prosperous--^[r]with life-joy and satisfaction in God's favor and salvation, regardless of their outward conditions) are the makers and ^[s]maintainers of peace, for they shall be called the sons of God!
FURTHER DOWN IN MATTHEW 5 – VS 23
 23"Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, 24leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.

The Journey to Abundant Living includes having a clear conscience:  dealing with offenses toward others.  Our first lessons were the vertical aspects of dealing with hindrances to living an abundant life – now we consider the horizontal implications and hindrances – how a right relationship with God affects our relationships with others.  Our verse – Acts 24:16  kjv ¹⁶ This being so, I myself always strive to have a conscience without offense toward God and men.  and NIV  ¹⁶So I strive always to keep my conscience clear before God and man.

 The apostle Paul understood the necessity of both dimensions.  As far as it was in his power, he wanted to be sure there was no offense standing between him and any other person.    The commitment to have a clear conscience is an important key to personal and corporate revival and living out our God-given identity in Christ.  When our conscience is clear, we have nothing to be ashamed of.    Tonight we will learn more about this and how to take some practical steps to obtain and maintain it.

Can you think of a time when the HS convicted you of a sin you had committed against someone, and you had no peace in your conscience until you made it right with that person? 

Discuss.

Before we can have a clear conscience ‘void of offense’ toward others, our conscience must first be clear with God.  Heb 10:19-23  ¹⁹Therefore, brothers, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus, ²⁰by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain, that is, his body, ²¹and since we have a great priest over the house of God, ²²let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water. ²³Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful.

Why can we draw near to God with a clean conscience and full assurance? 

We need to thank him regularly for that provision in Christ!

What does it mean to have a clear conscience?   There is no obstruction in our fellowship with God or anyone else.  It means we are careful to avoid sinning against God or others with our words, actions, or attitudes.  It also means that when we do sin, we quickly repent, admit our failure to all offended parties, ask their forgiveness, and make whatever restitution is necessary (Steps, 8, 9 & 10) Read these...

To have a clear conscience toward others means we have taken whatever steps are necessary to deal with every sin we may have committed against others.  – we can look everyone we know in the eyes without shame and know that we are right with them insofar as it depends on us. 

Define offense: 
2 : something that outrages the moral or physical senses
3 a : the act of attacking : assault
4 a : the act of displeasing or affronting b : the state of being insulted or morally outraged

Dealing with offenses – ours and others is complicated and difficult.  If we desire to obey God by having a clear conscience, we must pray from our heart and then seal our commitment to the Lord in some way... Sometimes we find that writing it out – starting like step 8 – making a list, or... writing out our covenant with God in the form of a prayer.  If you are willing to respond to this prayer as ‘yes’... then write it down tonight...  for example:

“Lord, I want to have a clear conscience.  Please reveal to me any issues I need to resolve with others and by Your grace, I commit to doing whatever You show me I need to do to make these matters right.”

Now… let me ask you this... have you ever considered that Jesus takes personally what we do or say to another person?  Check this out:  Matthew 25:37-46   ³⁷"Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? ³⁸When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? ³⁹When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?'
 ⁴⁰"The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.'
 ⁴¹"Then he will say to those on his left, 'Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. ⁴²For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, ⁴³I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.'
 ⁴⁴"They also will answer, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?'
 ⁴⁵"He will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.'
 ⁴⁶"Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life."

Jesus commends the righteous for ministering to His practical and personal needs and condemns the wicked for failing to do so.  Both groups are perplexed as to when or how they might have done this.

Acts 9 is the familiar story of Saul – Acts 9:1-5  ¹Meanwhile, Saul was still breathing out murderous threats against the Lord's disciples. He went to the high priest ²and asked him for letters to the synagogues in Damascus, so that if he found any there who belonged to the Way, whether men or women, he might take them as prisoners to Jerusalem. ³As he neared Damascus on his journey, suddenly a light from heaven flashed around him. ⁴He fell to the ground and heard a voice say to him, "Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?"

 ⁵"Who are you, Lord?" Saul asked.

According to vs. 1 and 2, who was Saul persecuting?

So... the good and evil we do to others, we do to Jesus.  This truth alone should provide reason enough for us to always strive to maintain a clear conscience.  We have to ask ourselves some tough questions:

Would I lie to Jesus?  Steal from him, hold a grudge or give him the silent treatment, believe or spread unfounded rumors about Him?  Jesus says ‘as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me’

Folks... we cannot be right with God and not be right with others.  So… when our relationship with God is revived – our relationships with others are impacted.  .. Conflicts, anger, bitterness get replaced with love, forgiveness, humility...

Revival swept through Canada and portions of the U.S. in the 70’s.  The epicenter was a Baptist Church in Saskatchewan.  During the initial days of this movement of the HS, 2 brothers were marvelously reconciled.  They had not spoken to one another in 2 years even though they attended the same church!  What!?  God broke through their hardness and pride – the fell into each others’ arms sobbing.  The church was amazed and God used their testimony to spread the reviving work He was doing in people’s lives there.

Right relationships – especially within the family of God – are one of the most powerful means of communicating the gospel to a lost world.  Let’s face it… when believers can’t get a long and work out their differences, we discredit the gospel!!!!!  When God’s people are reconciled, we demonstrate the power of the gospel and make it believable!!

Through the cross, those who were separated from God can draw near to Him.  And through that same cross, the dividing wall of hostility that exists between us and others has been broken down, making it possible for us to be reconciled and to live at peace with others.

Let’s pause for a moment right now and take a quick personal inventory.  Do you have a broken or strained relationship with any other person right now?  What is in your heart toward them – hurt feelings, critical spirit, conflict that is unresolved, bitterness, are you keeping score? have a desire for revenge?

Read Matthew 5:23-24  ²³"Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, ²⁴leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.  Now... after reading that... think of the ways you are currently servicing God (group, witnessing, worship, giving, teaching a class, speaking…  Close your eyes...  visualize a traffic signal hanging between you and that activity.  Is God calling you to ‘stop’ or to continue?  Is He giving you the green light because your conscience is clear, or has He turned the light red, indicating that you need to be reconciled with someone before your worship and service can be acceptable to Him?

-         Are there times when reconciliation is impossible?  When?   (discuss the lack of reconciliation – when it is not possible – and happens as an act of forgiveness only which is between them and God)

Making it Personal – reconciliation sounds wonderful, doesn’t it?  Of course.  But.. this doesn’t just happen.  At least one party must take the pathway of humility and accept personal responsibility for any wrong attitudes or actions.    Reconciliation requires we take whatever steps are necessary to obtain a clear conscience toward those we have offended or wronged.    Jesus emphasis this in the sermon on the mount: Matt 5:23-24  Why is reconciliation with others more important to God than whatever gifts we may offer to Him?

So.. what are some practical steps we can take to gain a clear conscience?

1.       make a list – person, how you sinned against them – be specific – to jumpstart your thinking:

-         Conscience clear

-          with my family?

-         Broken promises to family? Broken marriage vows – what are the vows?

-         Deceiving family in any way?

-         Slothful or negligent in duties at home?

-         Habits that irritate or frustrate your family?

-         Angry, resentful or abusive toward any family member?

-         Wounded the spirit of your mate?

-         Withheld love from your spouse, children, mom, siblings, etc?

-         Dishonored your parents or your in-laws?

-         Failed to provide in some way for your family? 

If your first thought when you think of someone is anger, resentment, dread or fear, chances are, that person needs to be added to your list!

Next group to deal with is your church family –

-         Gossip, slander, critical spirit toward pastor or leaders?

-         Area of service that God has asked you to do and you have refused – impacts the Body

-         Failed to tithe

-         Not baptized?

-         Hypocrite?

3 – Next group – having a clear conscience with the lost world

-         Stirred up disputes in the community or neighborhood

-         Stolen from businesses

-         Obey traffic laws, building codes, local ordinances?

-         Is your reputation good with your neighbors and those of which you conduct business?

-         Wld others conclude you are a Christ follower by your lifestyle?

-         Cheated on your income taxes?  Exams or papers in school?

Conscience clear in the work place?

Disrespect to supervisors

Resolve conflicts quickly and biblically

Work faithfully and diligently? 

Honest? – time off, lunch breaks

Other:

Conscience clear from your past?

Unresolved issues with people from your history

Committed a crime that has not been confessed?

Lied to anyone in an attempt to avoid consequences?

Self – destructive  behaviors?

Next step – after our list – we seek God’s forgiveness.

Every sin against another person is a sin against God.  Pray through your list and seek His forgiveness...   Then... we start working through the list and what God would have us do to seek a clear conscience – apologies, restitution, etc... Step 9

Let God guide as to who, what, where and when...  take your time... but don’t let it drop. – which will be discussed in the next couple of lessons.

When we do this tough work... we must – choose our words carefully and be humble.  Don’t offer excuses or make accusations regardless of how wrong the others person may have been.  Confess ‘your’ sin... don’t point out theirs.  Be specific about how you have sinned against that person.  Don’t just apologize or say “I’m sorry”.  – don’t push for the person to verbalize they forgive you in the moment... most do not have the ability to do that anyway... have realistic expectations.. Say ‘I hope that one day you can forgive me for how I have hurt you’.

-         Make restitution – cheated or stolen from someone, offer to restore what you have taken.  (How do we steal from our workplace that we may not be aware of?)

-         Pursue reconciliation of the relationship if possible.

-         Face the hardest situation first -- If you don’t, you may never go and do it... however, for some... we may have to take one small risk with someone else first... that’s ok...

-         Don’t stop till you are finished with the list – might take months or years – keep going!  What happens if you don’t know where the person is now – pray?  What is they are passed away? – grave site, letters, etc

-         Determine to maintain a clear conscience – take time regularly to do so.  Keep short accounts and deal with offenses as they occur as God convicts. 

“The testimony of a good conscience is the glory of a good man: have a good conscience and you will have gladness of heart”

Oswald Chambers – “I have to make an effort to keep my conscience so sensitive that I can live without any offense toward anyone”

Group Work

1.       Discuss the definition of having a clear conscience and why you believe this concept is important for believers to understand and practice.

2.       Why do you think there is such a strong connection between our relationship with God (vertical) and our relationships with others (horizontal)?

3.       If someone’s sin affects a group of people or becomes known publicly, how should that person go about clearing his conscience?

4.       What are the blessings of keeping a clear conscience with our families and church family?  What could possibly be the consequences of not doing so?

5.       If all followers of Christ purposed to have a clear conscience, how might this impact what we see and experience today?

6.       Share an example of how you have already begun to apply this lesson in your life.

7.       IF YOU ARE WILLING, SHARE A COUPLE OF PEOPLE THAT NEED TO GO ON YOUR LIST AND WHY.