Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Soul Detox L8: Emotional Detox - FEAR



SOUL DETOX
        TOXIC EMOTIONS – Fear Pollution

Unlocking the chokehold of fear – pic of some sort here

“I have never known more than 15 minutes of anxiety or fear. When I feel fearful emotions overtaking me, I just close my eyes and thank God that He Is still on the throne, reigning over everything, and I take comfort in His control over the affairs of my life’. ~ John Wesley

How many of us here can say that?  WOW.. awesome! 

Have any of you struggled with irrational fears?  Or.. developed rituals as a result of fears you has as a child or even have today?  What were you afraid of as a child?  The dark, spiders, snakes, thunderstorms, someone is under your bed, someone’s in the closet? What were your rituals to keep yourself safe or to ease the fear?

What about some of our adult fears?  Losing our job, getting sick, death and dying, running out of money – financial, divorce, being betrayed by friends or family members, rejection, and the list goes on….

The more fear we allow into our lives, the more we struggle to grow spiritually.. what?  Yes… It’s like, to quote Pastor Craig Groeschel “trying to plant an apple orchard in downtown L.A. The smog and air pollution is going to rob the saplings of the precious oxygen they need and contaminate their water supply. Fear poisons us a little each day if we don’t face it head-on and nullify its power.

The choice for each of us:
FEAR = Forget Everything And Run or.....
= Face Everything And Rise!

Pick your equation.. which would you prefer?

Interestingly, when babies are born- they have only 2 fears – natural fears – the fear of falling and the fear of loud noises. What does this mean to us?  Well.. it means that every other fear we have are learned fears or fears we have accumulated through experience.

There are typically 4 categories of fear

1.    Fear of Loss
2.    Fear of Failure
3.    Fear of Rejection
4.    Fear of the Unknown

1.    Loss – takes many different forms. If married – thoughts of losing their spouse. Almost every parent at some point, has dealt with the fear of losing a child or that something bad will happen to them. Financial – job loss, investments. Losing control – losing their mind..  What do you fear losing right now? These fears can grow and be so consuming they control our lives especially if the fear has been supported by past experiences. Lost a spouse before? A job? Fiancés? A friend? A childhood?
2.    Failure – As a believer who is doing ministry… what do you think this fear would sound like? I don’t know that I have been severely plagued with this one but.. it certainly does cross my mind on occasion. I do not want to disappoint the Lord.. I do not want to fail Him in any way. However, I know that I do sometimes.. L   hate that.. don’t you?  What about risk taking? Anyone here ever ‘not’ do something because they were afraid they would fail? Even some of the simplest things like trying a new hobby, sport, or something more serious like a business, going back to school, pursuing a particular relationship, reaching out to someone to care and share the love of Christ – we fear we will not do things well.. or do them right.. we will fail, therefore we choose to ‘not’ do them. What a loss!!! Fear of failure can paralyze us from starting any new endeavor – we are not absolutely sure we can do it, so… we never even try.  What are you afraid of failing at?
3.    Rejection – Including abandonment. If so.. you may be controlled by a people-pleasing mindset or tormented by the fear of the possibility of being rejected by someone you are very close to/ love – a spouse, a friend, family member. Are you ever afraid that people might not like you just as you are?  So… you try to figure out what would/ is acceptable and likable to them and become that or…think these thoughts: ‘I better go or they won’t like me. I don’t want to upset anyone if I don’t have to so… I’ll ____, What will he think if I don’t agree, Wonder if she’ll like this that I am wearing.. or how my hair is, etc, etc…’
4.    The Unknown – I heard that this is the #1 fear of every human being next to public speaking.  Which by the way, which category does that one go in?  Rejection.. Failure maybe?  This category of fear is full of the ‘what if’s’.   What if I ___ or ___ or ___.... 

Let’s talk briefly about some healthy fears.. if we want to even call them that..  things that we fear that can actually motivate us to stay on track, etc?
For those recovering addicts: the healthy fear of going back into our addiction.. how can this be good?  Other things.. ideas?

What about a healthy fear of God? 
Matthew 10:28
Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather, be afraid of the One who can destroy both soul and body in hell.

When we feel afraid…  ‘fear not’ or something similar to those 2 words is found in the Bible 365 times.  That’s 1 per day. When we fear, and by the way.. we will fear – we are human beings.. and fear is an emotion that we will all have… Psalm 56:3 NLT
But when I am afraid, I will put my trust in you… it says ‘when’…   So.. when we are fearful/ afraid, we need to acknowledge God’s truth – God, our all-knowing, always-present, all-powerful Father doesn’t give us fear. As it says in 2tim 1:7  NKJVFor God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.
If He is not the one giving us fear – who is?

God says:
Isaiah 41:10  NLT
Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.

Proper interpretation of many of the ‘fear nots’ in the Bible – listen to audio – thunderstorm – child story

Why can we dispel fear? Because…
1 John 4:18 NIV
There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.
Who loves us perfectly?
If we believe that then….. we as the psalmist in…
Psalm 112:7 can say..
They do not fear bad news; they confidently trust the LORD to care for them.

Romans 8:38
And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love.

Important insights about Fear…
Ever heard it said: the opposite of fear is faith? Pastor Craig disagrees and so do I… fear actually relies on faith – it’s simply what you are putting your faith in. Are you putting your faith and focus on ‘what if’s’ or… ‘God is’? Fear is created when we allow our minds to wander down a dark road and we are eventually taken captive by the ‘what if’s’ and the only thing that binds us and holds us there is our own imaginations.  80% of what we worry about never happens.. I wonder what the percentage is of the fears we have that never happen.- probably pretty close – what a waste of emotion, time, energy that could be directed more positively.

Bible Example of someone who struggled with this:  Moses
God called to Moses from the burning bush… hmmm. I think that would get my attention and I would do ‘whatever’… agreed?  Well.. not Moses.. he went right into the ‘what if game with God’. In Exodus 3, God reveals His entire plan and Moses’ role in the plan, even assuring him that God Himself would be with him. In the very next chapter, Moses responds by saying “God, what if they do not believe me or listen to me and say, The Lord did not appear to you?’ Same game most of us play.. right? Especially when God calls us because He wants to use our lives to do something significant.

So… we don’t really believe that God knows what He is doing right? We roll out the big long list of ‘what if’s’. All motivated by fear.  What if I can’t do it? What if my kids get hurt? What if we get in a car accident? What if we run out of money? What if I get sick? What if I just don’t know what to do?

Our what-ifs do matter…actually, they matter because we need to analyze them. If we do, we will get the added insight we need to get rid of the fear. Vital insights we can gain:
-         what we fear reveals what we value: many of which are important and we should value them – these fears will show what we prioritize in life, however, focusing on them too much can lead us down a path of worry rather than leading us to positive action of some sort – using it to motivate us – like the healthy fears we discussed earlier.
What we fear reveals where we trust God the least – when we have a persistent fear in a given area, it can be an indicator that we are not depending on God in that area. We are not trusting and allowing Him to handle it – be in control. Remember the definition of being a ‘fully devoted follower’ of Jesus Christ? This type of fear and worry reveals that we don’t really believe that God’s plans for us are good..in fact, it may reveal that we don’t believe God is good. It is quite possible that we really fear in the area of provision. We really can’t trust God to provide/ take care of us and yet, the truth is found in Matt 6:25 – 34 NLT.. God’s word to us is this:
 25 “That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing? 26 Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are? 27 Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?
28 “And why worry about your clothing? Look at the lilies of the field and how they grow. They don’t work or make their clothing, 29 yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. 30 And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith?
31 “So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?’ 32 These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. 33 Seek the Kingdom of God[d] above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.
34 “So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.
The way out of worry and fear is to face them. We must face our greatest fears in order to reach our greatest potential. Face the fear, destroy the fear! However.. God must lead us. He must be the one to lead us there and give us the victory over it.  It will take faith..  Hebrews 11:6 says ‘without faith, it is impossible to please God’. We must act, believe and speak in faith. It is not our faith that changes anything.. but… it is our faith in the One who can and will change things!  Speak to your fears with faith in the fear-destroyer – our Lord!  Especially when we find ourselves in the midst of something that we always feared.. it is then that we really need to believe in God’s goodness and power!

So….
1.    Identify Your Fears – admit them.
2.    Surrender them individually to God – commit to trust Him to give you the power to overcome. Allow Him to give you strength, wisdom and courage in defeating your fear once and for all.
3.    Trust with every bit of faith you have that God will be faithful – He will be faithful to see you through, help you endure, provide a way for you, a way to victory!
4.    Remember David and Goliath – time to kill your giant! Follow as David did… name your fear and say.. even though I am afraid, I am choosing to trust in You. Say it out loud.. over and over if you need to: I believe your Word, the truth, God. I am choosing to trust in You. Because of You, I can choose to NOT be afraid’.
5.    Praise & thank Him for the victory even before it comes.
6.    Seek the Lord – pursue deeper relationship with Him.. ask that you might know this perfect love that casts out fear.  Jer 29:12-13 NLT 12 In those days when you pray, I will listen. 13 If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me.

Seek Him in prayer. Seek Him with your friends/ brothers & sisters in Christ, ask them to pray with and for you. Ask for prayer that God will reveal Himself to you even more than He already has. That He will show you the path to overcoming all of your fears. Don’t stop. Day and night – keep asking and seeking! Every time you think of it – pray.

Every time we have fear – we must remind ourselves.. this is NOT from God. Don’t accept it. Don’t give in to it. God has given us power, love and a sound mind. Seek him and fear not, for the Lord is with YOU! He is with US!



SOUL DETOX – TOXIC EMOTIONS – FEAR POLLUTION
GROUP WORK
Group Check time again: 
·        I’ll know this group is still a safe place if you…
·        It really helps me when.. 
·        I tend to withdraw when…
·        In our discussions, the best thing you could do for me is:________
1.    Of the four categories of fears, in which do you find the most of your fears?  Loss, failure, rejection, unknown
2.    The first step in getting the victory over our fears is naming them – identifying.  Share any that you might have that you feel God is pressing upon you to face.
3.    What thoughts or emotions are you aware of when you consider the possibility of moving toward your fears rather than running from them?
4.    What are some healthy fears that you currently have besides the ‘fear of the Lord’?
5.    How will you seek/ pursue deeper relationship with the Lord this week so you can experience His perfect love?


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